In this paper, we utilize recent advancements in social media natural language processing to obtain state-of-the-art syntactic dependency parsing results for social media English. We observe performance gains of 3.4 UAS and 4.0 LAS against the previous state-of-the-art as well as less disparity between African-American and Mainstream American English dialects. We demonstrate the computational social scientific utility of this parser for the task of socially embedded entity attribute analysis: for a specified entity, derive its semantic relationships from parses’ rich syntax, and accumulate and compare them across social variables. We conduct a case study on politicized views of U.S. official Anthony Fauci during the COVID-19 pandemic.