However the biggest change in personality goes to my sixth period teacher. It should not have come as a surprise to me. This was the class that Shad and I were both a part of. Still, my teacher was someone that never shied away from telling a joke. I even wondered if he was in the right profession. Even his demeanor drastically changed. Everything about him - from the tone of his voice to the way he walked - became mellow. 
Shad changed people just by talking to them. She always had something nice to say. Even to those that acted mean to her. To strangers, those actions were alien. No one acted like that; at least not all of the time. She had a real gift. She had the ability to change the mood of anyone she came in contact with and now she was at it again.
The next day I was able to settle down. I accepted the fact that I could not do anything to bring her back to us. With a clear head, I began to rethink the way I carried myself every day. Before long, I realized that my whole outlook on life had changed. That experience truly was a reality check for me. I learned the hard way that death is blind; it knows no age, race, or creed. No one is safe from death, and it can strike at any time. 
From that point on, I developed a new way of thinking. I became a true optimist. I no longer hated every moment that I was at school; for I learned that our time here is precious. 
There was only one more thing that had to do in order to complete my personality overhaul. No matter what, that feeling of acute sadness was something that needed to be buried somewhere deep inside me. It was something that I never wanted to feel again. The best solution was to have a positive frame of mind no matter what happened. I wanted to be able to find a positive in every situation. That way I could bury that extreme sorrow and never have it return. 
While I will not say that her passing has desensitized me to death, I can say that I have become a better person because of it. Life has become much more enjoyable ever since my philosophy on life changed. The little things in life like waking up early for school and having to do homework no longer bother me like they used to. Situations that would normally change my mood for the worse no longer have an effect on me. Shad’s death may have been unpreventable. It may have even been necessary for life to move on. But she reminded me about one thing that I could control. She reminded me how to smile, and it is something that I will never forget. 
