Much of the tension throughout this story lies within what Jamie’s father defines as acceptable behavior. Jamie feels a certain duty in obeying her father, seeing his wishes fulfilled, just on the basis of “he’s my dad”. While it’s natural for a parental figure to hold both real and imaginative power over their children, there is a level of submissiveness within Jamie that ties both into her femininity and faults as a character. Back on the idea of stigmatization, females as submissive creatures, and men as dominant ones, exists very prominently in this time-period. It is apt for Jamie to submit to her father’s wishes, yet it is still flawed as they do not always handle her intersex condition with care. 
Another of the challenges to Jamie’s view of her gender comes from her father’s own, in the format of a document titled Things Boys Do. Throughout the book, being a male at least in Jamie’s eyes, is cold and lifeless, as though it’s death itself. This fits the document well, given that it’s a lifeless checklist from the father’s secretary. What’s most interesting about this document is that is gives the reader a greater view of what both Jamie and her father view was a male. For Jamie, certain parts of this document are truly awful. “Go back on hormones” and “cut your hair short” in particular are some of the biggest offenders, but the former obviously applies to Jamie’s intersex condition. All the same, certain aspects like learning to ride a motorcycle can be approached with some fun to it for Jamie. Yet, for Jamie’s father, these things appear to be simply normal aspects of what it means to be a boy. Regardless, Jamie’s adherence to her father’s wishes occurs without much opposition, further emphasizing the control he holds, but also showcasing Jamie as willing to accept ideas that are described as self-destructive perhaps in hopes to obtain acceptance. Given that Jamie is intersex, the very real possibility of not really feeling a sense of community anywhere is certainly possible. None of Jamie’s friends are intersex, nor is her family approving. Thus, it’s a fair assumption to make. Herein lies the problem however, with this acknowledgment comes the idea that Jamie’s own father could very well understand this as well, yet there is a continuation of his manipulation all the same.
The aforementioned submissiveness leads Jamie to opt to pursue testosterone injections, as her father proclaims that if she tries living as a boy for one year, then he is willing to work out something with her, should she not find it ideal. 
Even earlier, testosterone is viewed as poison for her intersex condition, causing Jamie to feel strange issues of arousal and guilt as a subsequent consequence of such. Knowing that testosterone has adverse effects on Jamie’s mental state, this is perhaps another area where her father’s omniscience falters. It is clear that Jamie’s father is fixated on a dedication to a stigma that has warped his definition of a man. Perhaps as a product of the times, Jamie’s father pursues the idea of the macho man as his ideal. Powerful, manly in appearance, and the possession of a buzz cut all lay as important features for Jamie to possess in the father’s eyes. Naturally, all of these things take away from Jamie’s femininity, clearly detrimental to her own desires, but also what Jamie defines as an intersex female.
